Phase to remember

Perhaps its the deepest trough i have ever been in my life. Experiencing a whole cocktail of different emotions. To summarise, I am free, I came out winning (depends how is it defined). BUT it took the following experiences over a three day period to do so - embarassment, shame, fear, guilt, depression, near death, repentance, redemption, hope, disgust, unforgiveness, desperation, renunciation, suicide, lost, et all. Glad its over, glad I died, glad i lost pieces of my armour, glad i fell, glad i cried. Its a new beginning, all over again.

::BJ:::::.. :::::...:on...:::d::...m::ov..e

Life tests

All the way till now- to be equally fair- it has been journey where i havnt encountered any difficulties in LIFE as what we are used to hear and read. Life has been good- thanks to good upbringing, great spouse, greatest parents, wise friends and a strong logical gray matter in control of most of the things. But now after 30 years, i think i am facing the biggest challenge/ dilemma/ difficulty in my life. Glad that i have realised and have been realising this. Time to evolve and move on to the next level in life. And i have to succeed, no matter what

::BJ:::::.. :::::...:on...:::d::...m::ov..e

Breathe slow focus hard

What a ride its been since the last 9 months- its like drifting in the sea - unpredictable, bout of calmness and roughness, oscillating between 'this is it' and 'this is nothing'. Experiencing new thresholds, redefinition of illusions, belief, confidence, despair, frustration, desperation et all- a total emotional cocktail. Have two projects closing out in the next one week and the 'pressure' is unbelievable to experience, jsut hope things turn out atleast 80% as expected.

::BJ:::::... :::::...:on...:::d::...m::ov..e